Short and Sweet: Well Wishes for the New Year

2011 . . .

Personally, this year was a fantastic test of endurance and patience. My will to thrive in the midst of difficulty was challenged on numerous occasions, but the wealth of inspiration I gained from sources around the world never ceased to remind me of what I have to be grateful for.
As I reflect, one source of inspiration measures profoundly above the rest.

The power of the human voice to make meaningful change laid firm grasp over the world in 2011. The protests in the middle east beginning with one determined man in Tunisia who commanded the attention of millions after setting himself ablaze inspired the uprisings in Egypt, Libya, Yemen, Saudi Arabia, Syria, Morocco and Bahrain. Now, thousands of Russians have discovered their unifying strength and are determined to see their country free of the iron rule of its longstanding leader, Vladimir Putin.

The Occupy Wall Street movement has shed light on the ever increasing divide between the top one percent and the rest of America's citizens and has since inspired many European and South American nations. The fight for equality for LGBT people gained tremendous momentum. Bullying in schools is being combated with greater force than ever before. Thousands of Latino immigrants are forcing America to recognize the value they bring to this country through the work they perform. Corruption, the world over, is being challenged with fervent resolve. Women are universally challenging the cultural and religious institutions that oppress and dehumanize.

Millions have spoken and the world has been listening.

It is my hope that in 2012 you will continue to use your voice to inspire others, to express gratitude and kindness, but to most importantly stand with courage in the face of that which seeks to silence you.

For the people of the world, near and far away; for friends and family that all inspire me daily, I am . . .

Have a Happy New Year

Something to Think About When You Go to Bed

There is a man named "Jimmy" who lives in my neighborhood. Jimmy is homeless. He tells me that if you have to be homeless, Hollywood is a good place because of the tourists from other countries. They tend to pity him more than local Angelinos. He tells jokes and they give him their change. 

Jimmy is different from many of the the homeless you encounter in and around Hollywood. He does his best to stay clean and presentable, he is organized and he speaks well. This is because Jimmy has served in one of the branches of the United States Military, but as a result, Jimmy suffers from PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and can't keep a job because he cannot focus on a task for more than a few seconds at a time. This is because he lives in a constant state of fear. He hasn't shared details of his experiences, but when asked how he ended up in his current situation, he simply responds, "Because I'm scared."

This fear causes Jimmy to only sleep when he is absolutely exhausted and only during the day. I don't know where he goes to feel safe at night. 

I first met Jimmy sleeping on this bench. I was purging things that I no longer needed and took a stack of blankets to this park at the end of my street. I knew someone would put them to use. 

Jimmy is no longer allowed to sleep on this bench during the day and can no longer be in the park after sunset. Police randomly patrol the area to ensure that it remains a safe and clean space for the general public. Unfortunately for Jimmy, he is no longer categorized as being apart of the general public. He is homeless and therefore an expendable class of human being.

Jimmy is not alone, though. There are thousands of homeless people living in Los Angeles, many of whom have served this country yet the social services provided by federal and local governments to assist them are simply inadequate for the volume of cases reported annually. 

Ironically, I stumbled across this bench, albeit nicer, in a store front window and thought of Jimmy.

 
I was amused by how similar this expression of Art, taste and design was to the public bench in the park that Jimmy was no longer allowed to sleep on. I was even more amused by the four figure price tag.

I wonder if the person that purchases this bench would allow Jimmy to sleep on it? Surely they would appreciate the fact that Jimmy has made a valiant effort to ensure our own safety. Perhaps they would let him feel safe, if only for an afternoon, on their bright, shiny new bench. 

I know this would never happen but I don't want Jimmy to have to think about benches. I want Jimmy to have a bed, a roof and food; a place to feel safe. Amazingly, Jimmy is grateful for that park bench when he is able to steal a couple hours. Although he is rarely allowed more than that.

Think about Jimmy the next time you go to bed.  

Being Grateful in the Wake of Tragedy: Is it Possible?

The Christmas season for most is a time of joy. Unfortunately for one Stamford, Connecticut family, Christmas Day ended in tragedy. Accomplished advertising executive, Madonna Badger, sadly lost her three young daughters and her parents to a house fire in the early hours of Christmas morning reportedly due to unattended embers in one of the home’s fireplaces.

When news of this tragedy broke, I immediately felt nauseous. It couldn’t have been true. Not on Christmas.

As details emerged, my heart ached and I could do nothing but look at my own family and think of how fragile life is and how quickly it can change. I even thought of my friends and their families. What, if anything, needed to be said? Was there anything we could do right then and there to safe guard against a similar tragedy happening to us? I didn’t know. Thoughts of this, naturally, flooded my mind throughout the day, but there was nothing I could do but be grateful that such devastation avoided the homes of those I love and care for.

I believe there is nothing I can say that can truly console Mrs. Badger or her family. In the wake of such an incredible loss, I don’t even want to begin to imagine what she and her husband must be feeling. But this leads me to the question of whether or not it is possible to be grateful when you’ve experienced such tragedy.

I honestly don’t know if I could be grateful. Perhaps I could reclaim a sense of gratitude over time, but how long would it take? I imagine the blaring questions in my mind would be: Why? Why me? What have I done to deserve this? Am I being tested?

There are no definitive answers. To cope, some might prescribe leaning on faith and others may say that this is simply nature taking its course. Either way, I believe my options would be to face the coming days or not.

I would like very much to believe that Mrs. Badger is a woman of incredible strength; that she has the courage and fortitude to look deep within and see purpose remaining, if only by a thread. This is what I hope for her as she and her husband have been spared. I could say that there is a reason behind everything or that things just happen. I don’t know.

I do know that for the life I have, I am grateful. I have adopted a Grateful Brand, which is the inspiration for this blog and for this fledgling movement. In spite of what has been, what is and what has yet to come, I want the Universe to know that, deep in my core, I want to be grateful, but I am human. In the wake of such tragedy as experienced by Mrs. Badger, I do not know if I could face the coming days, yet it is my sincerest hope that she can.

If nothing else, I hope that she can see that the day, in itself, is a gift to be grateful for. 

I would like to thank:
Huffington Post and Matt Friedman of Associated Press

Show Your Body a Little More Gratitude

It's that time of year again. We're all taking stock of 2011 and making big plans for 2012. The resolutions are piling up and, as to be expected, many of those resolutions revolve around making some change regarding health and image. But how long does the typical New Years Eve implemented resolution last? I don't think I need to conduct a study or acquire any research to know that most of us will not do a very good job of sticking to our plans and it is because of this lack of discipline and commitment that I dislike resolutions all together. 

What could be started today and, in all honesty, what could have been done six months ago, is often delayed for the ceremonious designation of being a short lived resolution. I've done it, you've done it. We're all guilty. But regarding our health and self image, why wait?

What if your body could literally speak to you. What do you think it would say? I think the answer is quite simple. 

"Take care of me." That's it. 

Think of yourself for a moment as two separate entities that just happen to be very dependent upon one another. There is your mind and then there is your body. The mind will naturally be consumed with what it is able to envision; what it sees. These visions often distract from more important, unseen matters. The body is a machine with thousands of different components. Like an automobile, it requires maintenance to function properly over the course of a lifetime. 

Unfortunately, there are no indicator lights on our foreheads to let us know when something within our bodies requires maintenance. Therefore, it is better to get in the habit of doing little things now, in the immediate, to ensure that our bodies function at an optimum level. Your cells are fighting hundreds if not thousands of pathogens and toxic materials every day and if you are under the impression that a short lived resolution will keep you going unscathed for the remainder of your life, you are grossly mistaken. 

To maintain my health I do three things that have become a habit. Dieticians and trainers will likely encourage you to do more, but I do these three things because I am able to be relatively consistent. 

First, I take a multivitamin. Second, I exercise in 30 - 45 minute sessions at least 3 times a week. And third, I buy a fresh vegetable juice smoothie at least twice a week. Do I sometimes forget my vitamin? Yes. Do I sometimes skip the gym? Yes. I actually like my smoothie but it certainly isn't the doctors daily recommendation of fruits and vegetables. Nevertheless, I do what I can to show my body a little gratitude. 

If you have a juicer, great! But if you don't, here in Los Angeles there are great establishments such as Cafe Gratitude in Larchmont and Urth Caffe in West Hollywood and Santa Monica that offer a wide variety of healthy fare. Whole Foods also offers a broad assortment of healthy beverages.

For those in need of a little more guidance in terms of simple things you can do to enhance the quality of your diet to show your body a little more gratitude, I encourage you to check out a blog run by Chef Marcus Guiliano of Aroma Tyme Bistro in Hudson Valley, New York at www.chefonamission.com. He's a cool guy that is simply passionate about living an enjoyable, healthy life.

If you're determined to wait for 2012 to show your body some love, so be it, but this time, make a solid commitment to yourself and your body. I promise, YOU will be grateful you did.  

Tis the Season?

While having a coffee in a café near my home, I overheard a conversation between two young women in their late teens or early twenties that really disappointed me. One was explaining to the other how it was important for her to “act extra grateful” this time of year because her parents took the holidays very seriously. Both were well dressed and carried the usual accessories that signaled having a healthy budget for such things, but the volume with which they spoke and the subject matter really became somewhat of a spectacle for the entire coffee shop. In hindsight, I don’t believe either of them once clued into the fact that they had become such a show.

“We always take pictures doing some kind of volunteer work but it sucks. It’s such a waste of time,” one said to the other. I was compelled to approach and applaud them for volunteering their time with the hopes of giving their actions a degree of validation; something to be proud of rather than degrading their display of altruism as being a “waste of time,” but I held back. I began to question whether or not she was even telling the truth or just saying that she volunteered for show. All in all, it was none of my business. I was just a happenstance eavesdropper but I wondered what the example was that these women followed and if there were younger girls following their example.

From the moment I laid eyes upon them, I immediately drew comparisons between them and a certain reality show franchise family. If her claim of having participated in doing said volunteer work was true, it was admittedly not by choice. She and her family were compelled to project a certain image, as I’m sure many families do during the holidays, letting their good deeds serve as nothing more than good public relations.

There are many who would ask these girls to not bother at all simply because their motives for helping others are not for the purpose of helping others, but rather completely self serving. But I disagree. Whatever the motive may be, helping is helping.  If they feel that they need to volunteer and take photographic evidence to prove to their friends and colleagues that they are, indeed, caring people, then so be it. I would, however, encourage them and everyone else to not identify what you are grateful for solely during the holidays, nor limiting those corresponding expressions of gratitude exclusively through some means during the giving season, but to express gratitude and spread kindness year round.

With every sunrise we are given the opportunity to do what ever it is we so chose. Granted, there is the mundane rank and file that most of us fall into, but in truth, we make the decision to fall in line from day to day. This is our choice. For that choice, I am grateful.

The holidays are a wonderful time to relax, spend time with family, etc. But can you imagine what this world would be like if everyone took three minutes out of every day to deliberately bestow upon someone else an act of kindness? Unfortunately, I would assume that the young women in the café are, at this stage in their lives, too self absorbed to make a concerted effort to help someone else of their own free will for three minutes out of every day, but perhaps life will one day open their eyes to see the world beyond their sunglasses. There is beauty to be experienced at all levels and most things to be grateful for do not come with a price tag nor need to be proven to anyone.       

Being Grateful for the Present Before the Present Becomes the Past

I return to you well rested and very happy to have spent the Christmas Holiday with some of the people I love most in this world. It was truly special and I hope you all share the same sentiments of your own holiday gatherings. 

While my holiday was well spent, I have a tendency to become nostalgic before the present has an opportunity to settle into being the past. I think this is a good thing but it also conjures up conflicting emotions. I was reminded, yet again, of the inevitability of change and how this change is ever constant. But--and perhaps this is selfish of me--there are some things that I just don't want to change. 

Every year at Christmas I find a little something for myself and this year I found a semi-rare used book. With increasing popularity, I've been noticing more and more handheld devices like iPads and Kiddles that can store hundreds if not thousands of books right there at your finger tips. They really are amazingly convenient but, as for me, I still prefer actual books. I, of course, could have gone on Amazon to have purchased my book but this would have taken away from the experience I had. 

While wandering through downtown Los Angeles, I discovered Caravan Book Store. It was stunning. Tucked away behind a Starbucks was this treasure trove of literature, history, art, poetry; a real plethora of varied topics. Everything was of considerable age and had been meticulously cared for over many years. Even the smell was that of which only a book store of this caliber could rightfully claim as being unique to the quality of care that has gone into the preservation of this establishment.   

I found my particular book tucked away in a back corner and as if it had been waiting for me, I opened it and the first page I happened to see was the beginning of a chapter titled, "The Ethic of Gratitude." It was delightfully poignant. I left it at the register where the owner asked if it was a gift for someone to which I replied, "No. Thank you. It's just for me." I took in the store for another moment but when I returned to pay, my book had be wrapped as if it were for someone who cared deeply for such things. I believe this was just his standard practice but I had never experienced such care before from any retailer.

I know that it's just a book but the experience of discovering Caravan and purchasing that book only served to enhance my day and on Christmas eve, I unwrapped that book and enjoyed every moment of it. But for how much longer will stores and practices like this be available? I wish there was some federal guarantee of protection for such establishments but, sadly, a bookstore will never be as important as, say, a bank or an automotive manufacturer. 

In the next 3 years Caravan will be celebrating it's 60th anniversary. It is my hope that it will be a Los Angeles fixture for many years to follow but we'll see what the economy presents. 

I don't mean to give you a narrow perspective of what I'm nostalgic about but bookstores are something that I appreciate. Over the holiday, my grandmother made all of the gifts she gave me, of which there were two beautiful scarves and the beginnings of a blanket which she kept to continue working on. I love them because they are not only good looking, but they are from her. What I've realized is that 'Made by Grandma' is a label that, like the bookstore, does not have a continued production guarantee. I am fortunate to still have all of my grandparents but I want to make the best effort to appreciate who they are, what they have done and what they continue to do before my warm, comfortable present becomes a nostalgic past. In terms of currency, money holds no coin to time. Give of yourself and your time when you can. It will be appreciated.  

A Letter for You

On December 14th I announced the official launch of Grateful Brand with my inaugural post to this blog. This venture has been an idea; a dream for four years and over the past ten days you have been helping me bring that dream into fruition. 

My expectations have been exceeded tenfold and I am truly humbled and appreciative for the fact that you have given Grateful Brand your time and attention. This world is flooded with content of endless variety across dozens of different mediums, yet you have graciously taken the time to read and share what comes from my mind into your own life. You have shown me that my voice matters and that Grateful Brand is indeed a valid platform from which to spread this message of the importance of being grateful and expressing that gratitude through positive messaging and acts of kindness. But this is just the beginning. 

With your continued support, Grateful Brand will flourish and continue to inspire. I want people, the world over, to adopt a grateful brand of their own and serve as examples of what it truly means to be present, aware and at peace within their surroundings. We need to show more appreciation for ourselves, for our families, our neighbors, our communities, our environment and the world beyond our home borders. It begins with us.

In light of the holiday, I will be spending the next two days with my family and not posting to Grateful Brand. I will be using this time to reflect and remember what I am grateful for. I encourage you to do the same and share your thoughts through either commenting directly or emailing at gratefulbrand@gmail.com.


With every fiber of my being, I thank you with warm wishes for this holiday season. 


Dane Blackburn

Grateful Brand 

Something to be Grateful for: Forgiveness

It saddens me to think of how many people around the world--families and friends--are estranged due to conflict, disagreement or some presumed animosity that takes precedence above the love that once solidified a bond. I understand that in many instances, treaties are agreed upon, but the relationship that once was can never be reclaimed. Some pain never completely goes away. And for the case of many friendships, I agree with the old adage that says, some friends are for but a season, and others are for a lifetime.  

In considering what makes us special; what makes us unique in this universe, I would say that one of the most beautiful characteristics of the human design is that we all have engrained in us the ability to forgive. Weather we exercise this ability or not is subject to our own individuality, but when we let pride or fear prevent us from realizing one of the absolute gifts of being human, we are, in fact, failing to master all that we are capable of. 

As we head into a new year, please know that it is never too late to realize what you are capable of. Be grateful for forgiveness. Be willing to forgive and know that you are worthy of being forgiven.   

Being Grateful for Dummies

I must admit that I am a fan of the For Dummies instructional books. If you are not familiar, For Dummies has published the largest and most widely recognized reference series in the world. Their collection encompasses over 1,800 topics, of which I own 7. 

Unfortunately, For Dummies is a little late to the table when it comes to the topic of being grateful and how to appropriately express gratitude. I do gather that this topic would not generate as much revenue as say, Crocheting or Building a Website, but I do feel that there is a target market that could greatly benefit from having a guide for navigating any obstacles associated with expressing gratitude.

Over the past several months the Occupy Wall Street movement has been shedding light on the ever widening divide that separates the fiscally well-to-do 1% from the rest of America, affectionately known as the 99%. The idea that the 1% should pay more in taxes than they already do is growing in popularity. As to be expected, many in the exclusive 1% fervently object this proposal but are smart to keep their opinions mum. When you're 1 against 99, it would be wise to, at the very least, remain private or perhaps even appear cohesive. This brings me to my lesson on being grateful. 

There are two categories of gratitude. The first is being grateful for the sake of public relations and the second is genuinely being grateful. 

I will use Bank of America as my case study in being grateful for the sake of public relations. 

From a charitable standpoint, Bank of America has indeed given away hundreds of millions of dollars of its profits from year to year, but what BofA leadership seems to regularly forget is that their bank would not exist if it weren't for the billions of dollars earned by working class Americans that have flooded their coffers. In a move regarded by many as being motivated purely by greed, BofA announced that it would be charging a monthly $5 fee for the use of debit cards. Making a long story short, BofA is still entrenched in ill sentiment and is desperately trying to shovel its way out.

Giving to charity for tax purposes or to simply appear connected to those you profit from does not pay off in the long run. Being intelligent and aware are not characteristics exclusive to those in the boardroom. People see through fake gratitude thus, expressing gratitude for the sake of PR will not serve anything but a tax return. BofA's CEO, Brian Moynihan, famously said in defense of the fee that the bank, "has a right to make a profit," but what exorbitant sum must BofA amass before it looks at the state of the nation that made it the largest bank in America--our lacking educational system, poverty, hunger--before it decides to give simply out of being grateful for all that it has been afforded? Something tells me that their PR executive would abstain from commenting.
 
Conversely, I read this morning an article about professional football player Braylon Edwards. In 2005, Braylon pledged to give 100 eighth graders $10,000 for college if they graduated high school with a GPA of 2.5 or greater. Of the 100, 79 ultimately qualified for the $10,000 scholarship and Braylon kept his word. His current salary is reported as being 1 million dollars. Do the math. If you have any questions regarding whether or not Mr. Edwards is grateful for where he is today, please make an effort to find him and ask him directly, what he is grateful for. 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with profiting and being wealthy.  I believe strongly that, for their wealth alone, the 1% should never issue an apology, but I will quote one of my favorite writers to express the sentiment of the 99% in the hopes of enlightening:

"I hate ingratitude more

in a man than lying,

vainness, babbling,

drunkenness, or any

taint of vice whose

strong corruption

inhabits our frail 

blood."

- William Shakespeare

Hopefully this will give the 1% something to think about.

I would like to thank:

Huffington Post and Jillian Berman for her post, "Bank of America to Lose Most from Overdraft Fee Rules: Report"

Yahoo Sports and Chris Chase for his post, "Braylon Edwards Gives 79 Students $10,000 for College"

   

Design With Gratitude

One of my favorite things to do in the world is to simply come home. My space is far from lavish but it’s mine. There are even times when I wish my two cats would leave for a weekend, but they themselves contribute to making coming home special.

Living in Los Angeles though, I find myself being inundated with trends. What you wear, what you listen to, how you speak, who you know and who they know and who those people know, diets, fads, what you drive and how your home is designed are all up for discussion, or rather, scrutiny to determine what the It thing is from moment to moment.

I can’t afford to follow most trends set in this city and instead of feeling sub par, I actually feel as though my life is just less complicated. The aesthetic of my home though, is very important to me. While I avoid clutter between my occasional messes, I have surrounded myself with photos, books, plants, a white board, an electric guitar that my Dad gave me when I was in college, some artwork, a vintage metal trunk that I’ve had since attending boarding school, and a 1920’s era desk. All of these things appeal to my sense of beauty but they also have a story. They are in many ways reflections of me and I feel privileged to have so many things that never cease to conjure up warm feelings and fond memories.

My modest collection also inspires me on a regular basis. Does this look familiar? It should.

That is because this is my Paul Neubauer desk, the very same desk used in the design of www.gratefulbrand.com. But contrary to what you may be thinking or perhaps Googling, Paul Newbauer is not the latest interior design brand name to hit the LA scene. This desk once belonged to a gentleman named Paul Neubaurer. 

This label was still intact in the upper right hand drawer when I acquired the desk from a production studio set designer.

When I purchased my Paul Newbaurer it was not in its current condition. In fact, a lot of time, effort, sweat and love went into bringing this desk back to life and, in doing so, my dear Paul Neubaurer has inspired me tremendously and serves, every day, as the platform from which I express my gratitude to the rest of the world.  

Make your home a place that you are grateful to be in. It will serve you well. I promise.
 

There are No Prerequisites for Being Grateful

Over the weekend I received some feedback regarding Grateful Brand that was very positive in the general scope of praise, but this individual alarmed me with what was, in my opinion, a very narrow and misguided viewpoint of the origins of gratitude and what one must be to experience what was stated as being, “true gratitude.”

For the purpose of this entry, we will refer to this individual as Mary.

With a warm embrace and encouragement to continue developing Grateful Brand, Mary asserted that, “We need more young Christian men like you in the world expressing their gratitude. Lord knows where we would be if there weren’t people like us.” 

I knew Mary’s intentions were well founded and because of her pleasant nature I did not have the heart to tell her that I did not identify with the Christian faith nor any faith for that matter, but that I am simply a privately spiritual person. I was alarmed because, in her mind, there was only one reasonable explanation as to why I could have been producing Grateful Brand and that reason was that I was a born again Christian. I had to be. Christianity was the absolute truth and there weren’t exceptions. But what if I was Muslim, Jewish, Buddhist, Mormon, a Scientologist or, dare I say, completely Atheist? Would it matter? Sadly, in Mary’s mind, I think it would.

I would like to give you a brief, assumed history of gratitude in relation to human beings. You’ll have to pardon me, though, as I am basing this assumption on logic and what limited anthropological education I have. I do not hold a PhD in evolutionary biology nor have I ever been to seminary. Based on what I know to be the nature of human beings, I would deduce that from mankind’s introduction to the world, we have been fighting for survival. It is a natural and instinctual response to express appreciation either behaviorally or through verbal communication in a effort to gain favorable odds for having that which is appreciated occur again, thus making survival easier, even if only by the slightest of margins.

Mary implied that to be “truly grateful,” one must have a relationship with the Christian God, otherwise, there would not be as much to be grateful for. Life could not possibly be as fulfilling. She may not have said it explicitly, but her convictions were forthright and expressed through who she was and how she functioned in her surroundings. What alarms me about this is that Mary is not alone. Billions of people around the globe would need to convert; need to change their belief system to live on a divinely higher plain, enabling them to express true gratitude. For the record, I completely disagree with this. To be grateful, you need only be human. It is this shared quality and being able to bestow kindness that produces gratitude.

The cyclical nature of gratitude is that people who have something to be grateful for perform acts of kindness. Mary may be a woman of strong conviction, but there are no differentiating values associated with the extent of her gratitude and my own. We are grateful.

I affirm anyone’s right to believe as they will, but I need only look back through history to know that religious differences have motivated the slaughter of millions of people over the course of our humanly existence. With beliefs so strong, I can understand how people can forget that we are all just human.        

Food for Thought and Candy for the Eye

I love venturing to the Hollywood Farmers Market on Sundays. Even if I don’t purchase anything, it’s still a pleasant place to spend time, people-watch and take in a little culture. There are so many wonderful things to see, smell and experience. The produce are always incredibly fresh and aesthetically pleasing to the eye. I wish it wasn’t limited to just Sundays.

On this particular excursion I came across a very focused young woman who was writing poems with a vintage typewriter on her lap. Any subject you’d like for what ever you’d be willing to pay. I wish I had had some cash on me.

I also met a brilliant musician by the name of Phillip King who played the harp with incredible dexterity. Amazingly, he paired this classical based instrument with beat boxing. The combination was unexpected but magically, it worked.

                         

While walking home from the Market, I began to reflect on my experience there. It was all just so easily accessible. Quality food, food education, works of art, crafts of all sorts, music, the sense of community, laughter. It was, for me, normal: a typical Sunday morning. I then began to think about how many people in the city of Los Angeles simply lack the ability and resources to access such a wonderful market. But in relation to the world, Los Angeles is so small. There are millions of people on this planet that don’t have access to nutritious food and clean water. There are millions of people on this planet that lack the freedom to express themselves artistically. 
 

It is amazing to think how incredibly fortunate we are.  

What We Can Learn from a Molted Feather

This morning I enjoyed a wonderful exercise in interpretation and projection. Having been an English major with a heavy concentration in Poetry, I tend to examine and dissect literature, visual art, nature, inanimate objects and interestingly random occurrences, finding meaning in Life’s, often overlooked, small details.

As I opened my apartment door to let my two cats, Quarterback (QB) and Sadie, out into the courtyard, I noticed this feather positioned exactly as pictured on the railing directly in front of my door. “How peculiar,” I thought. I immediately returned for my handy iPhone to capture the photo. Personally, I find the symmetry to be quite beautiful.

I then began to think about the bird that may have lost this feather and whether or not it was still alive and, if so, able to fly without it. Judging by the ash-gray color, I would guess it once belonged to a pigeon, but I’m no ornithologist. I then began to think of myself as a bird and what species I might be. Then came the self-pity. Don’t judge. We’re all allowed every now and then.

I have experienced enough rejection in my quarter century to now be able to handle rejection of all sorts very well. However, I also like to think of myself as a veritable wagon wheel, but with more important things to support than a payload of bruised ego. This doesn’t mean, though, that I simply forget. Numerous opportunities I’ve pursued, people I’ve been completely enamored with, and jobs I’ve applied for have all fed me, “you’re not this and you’re not that and you don’t have this and you don’t have that,” and so forth and so on. Disappointment and hurt are alive and well, but after my moment of pity, reflecting on the metaphorical feathers that I don’t have and feeling like a little brown emu, I realized that I needed to get over myself.

I chose to believe that my pigeon friend, wherever he may have been, was alive and well and I returned to reality. If you watch enough National Geographic and Animal Planet, you’ll know that molting is a natural occurrence in most animal species and, in the case of birds, where one feather is lost, another eventually takes its place leaving flight uninterrupted.

I am not an emu. In fact, I believe I have more in common with that obnoxiously resilient pigeon than I initially thought this morning. I may not have or may not be many things but, nevertheless, I am flying. Perhaps not gracefully, but flying is flying.  For the ability to keep my feet ever so slightly off the ground, I am grateful.

And, if you think about it, there’s really no place I can go but up.     

Share your stories with me at gratefulbrand@gmail.com. I would love to hear from you.

  

Life: Beautiful, Not or In Between

While driving north on La Brea Ave or Highland Ave in Los Angeles, California toward Hollywood, it’s hard to miss the large “Life Is Beautiful” murals painted on the sides of two prominent buildings. And it’s true; if asked to give a simple yes or no answer to whether Life was beautiful or not, I would say that Life is indeed beautiful. But lets be honest about our understanding of Life and how we’ve experienced it. I’m sure you’ll agree that Life is all encompassing: yesterday, today, and tomorrow, the good, the bad, and the indifferent. I don’t mean to come off as being cynical—I agree with the obvious message captured in this artwork—but the murals also capture a simple, yet less obvious, truth as implied by the choice of colors and conceptual design.

The bold, white block lettering followed with an exclamation point implies optimism, truth, love, hope, good; a myriad of wonderful things that affirm the joys that contribute to making Life beautiful. But we would be delusional if we dared to assume that Life’s beauty is summed up in general positives. Life is easily corrupted with lies, hate, violence, injustice, struggle and this is illustrated by the dripping white paint, ascending from the letters themselves. As if being corroded naturally, the artist has given the city of Los Angeles a beautifully accurate visual metaphor for the city itself, and Hollywood in particular. So many people flock to Los Angeles in the pursuit of grand dreams only to leave mentally and physically crushed and penniless. This reality is further captured by the black background, which represents the balance between Life’s joys and pains.

This is a very random thought, but appropriate for the subject matter. I have an affinity for nature documentaries and while I enjoy observing and studying wildlife, the truth is, a lioness will nurture her cubs in one scene and will be hanging from the jugular of a zebra in the next, or will even destroy the offspring of competing species with fervent hatred. This is life, and this is just the way it is and, will continue to be.

The artist and optimist in me wants to see these murals inspire everyone who gazes upon them for many years to come, but, instead of believing solely that Life Is Beautiful, I must resign myself to believing that, in Life, there is beauty—of which the eye of the beholder should interpret and come to an individualized conclusion—scattered amongst everything else, and therefore, Life just is.

In believing that Life just is, though, I realize that I am taking away from the romance that comes with pondering Life’s meaning or purpose. But I want to assert that even if my interpretation on this artwork is completely misguided and I come off as being artistically uninformed, know with absolute certainty that I am grateful for Life: yesterday, today, and tomorrow, the good, the bad, and the indifferent.

Life is. And I am grateful.
       

Putting “Thank You” on a Scale

If your mothers or grandmothers were anything like mine, you’ll be able to attest to being constantly reminded of the importance of saying Thank You. As a child, if I received anything, be it a compliment, a snack, and on some occasions, even a scolding, the exchange would immediately be followed by that firm motherly voice, commanding, “What do you say?” By the time I received my queue to prove to whomever that I was a well-mannered child, I was usually fixated on something completely different. I was always quick to respond, but rarely was I able to maintain eye contact. This was forgivable. I was young.

Now, as an adult, being courteous is just standard protocol. I would go so far as to say that for most, it is akin to a reflex and, if you happen to lack this reflex, well then, you must be pretty important.

For the rest of you who remain in tune with your surroundings, I would like to give you something to ponder. What if we could apply a measurement to our Thank Yous, specifically, weight. This measurement would be a reflection of the degree of appreciation and sincerity associated with each individual Thank You that we utter. The heavier the Thank You, theoretically, the more appreciative and sincere you are. How heavy would the average of all of your Thank Yous be over the course of one month? Bear in mind that this is taking into consideration anything from thanking the bagger at your local grocery store to thanking the only compatible person in the world for voluntarily coming forth as a match for a vital organ transplant.

The point of this hypothesis is that the weight of a Thank You can mean the difference between someone wanting to return to their job the next day or not. It could be the unexpected boost that someone needs to feel like they matter in a world that doesn’t seem to care very much about them. You just never know.

With all of the technology at our disposal—regularly being carried—and because of how self-absorbed we all tend to be, I would wager that the average weight of a Thank You is pretty low, especially directed toward those whose occupations are solely designed to serve or convenience others.

Recently, I hosted a holiday gathering that also served as the makeshift birthday party for my friend, Pete’s, girlfriend. Not having very much money to put towards the occasion, I decided I was going to, instead, devote a little more time and creativity than I had initially planned. I bought some cheap wine, cooked a huge pot of Thai Yellow Curry and made a small Birthday Cake. Once the food was ready, I cleaned my studio apartment, put on some music and lit a mistletoe-scented candle. It was the best I could do but I knew it would be appreciated. Our little gathering went smashingly, candles were blown out, wishes were made and we finished the night in fine style.

The next day Pete called me. My immediate thought was that he had forgotten something but we briefly exchanged memories of the night before, laughing, but then he paused. “I needed to say Thank You again.” He told me how special he thought everything was and how much his girlfriend appreciated everything and I casually responded, “No worries, man. I’m glad you enjoyed.”

What Pete doesn’t know is that when I got home the night before, I looked at my place and thought, “I can’t do this again.” But his call changed everything. He didn’t have to, but Pete gave me a very heavy Thank You and knowing that my efforts were appreciated and knowing that I, as a person, was appreciated, meant a lot to me.

As you go forward, I expect that you will remain courteous, but I encourage you to put a little more weight behind your Thank Yous. Again, you never know what effect it may have.