Your Love or Their Love

Valentines Day has the power to turn generally positive, up-beat people into wallows of negativity. It happens without fail. These people are typically single or newly single and begin to succumb to the negativity rally as soon as the first Valentines Day advertisements appear on television, are heard over the radio or upon seeing displays in stores.

Society has a way of encouraging the "keeping up with the Joneses" mentality which enforces the idea of being less than if you have less than your neighbor. The same applies to love and relationships. Many singles feel inferior or will allow themselves to become negative or even hateful and envious of those close to them or even strangers within their general periphery who seem to have the perfect love. Valentines Day is but an amplifier for these sentiments.

A fact that many singles fail to realize is that love shared between two people is a unique connection that can not be replicated. People can surely fall in love numerous times over the course of their lives but none of those connections is identical to another. 

To be covetous of another's love is foolish because it is impossible to have the connection that someone else has with their significant other. Once we acknowledge this, we must then deal with our feelings of loneliness and wanting our own unique connection. We must also be honest with ourselves and differentiate between love and lust, how both influence our emotional impulses and determine which is more important to us in the moment versus long term.

In spite of the billion dollar industry of love advice and consultation, I believe there is no better catalyst for attracting love than being positive. Exuding kindness, warmth, sincerity, being grateful ... all of these characteristics will be noticed and sought after in a sea of negativity. Unfortunately, we live in an age and time when gratification--in a general sense--is virtually instant, can be paid for and is typically only a few clicks of a mouse away thus conditioning us to approach love with the same sense of convenience.

Patience is one of the key components to making love last. Logically, if you are incapable of being patient nor happy in your search for love, one could not expect you to be patient with them while supposedly being in love.

So, to all my fellow singles out there, as you go forward, don't succumb to negativity when you are reminded that you do not have a significant other. Find joy in the fact that there are still people around you and in the world who believe in the pursuit of love. Be honest with yourself. If love is what you truly want, believe that there is a unique connection waiting for you, but be willing to be patient.