How Healthy is Your Ego?

Dictionary.com defines 'ego' as: the “I” or self of any person; a person as thinking, feeling, and willing, and distinguishing itself from the selves of others and from objects of its thought.

Simply, your ego is an internal, albeit invisible mechanism with the sole purpose of prioritizing you first.

We all know or have met people who seemingly focus on nothing but me, me, me, me, me, I, I, I, I, I, my, my, my, my, my and mine, mine, mine, mine, mine. Sometimes I even look back over some of my previous blog posts and gasp at my excessive usage of "I," but we'll save dissection of my ego for another day :)

There is nothing wrong with having an ego. In fact, it is a natural part of the human design. It is when our egos become excessively inflated that problems and conflict arise. The lens through which we see the world begins to filter the grit unrelated to self or self preservation, as if panning for gold in a riverbed. Our egos fixate on that which shines brightest, which, by design, means the ego fixates on self.

Rod Sterling once wrote, "The tools of conquest do not necessarily come with bombs and explosions and fallout. There are weapons that are simply thoughts, attitudes, prejudices -- to be found in the minds of men. For the record, prejudices can kill and suspicion can destroy, and a thoughtless, frightened search for a scapegoat has a fallout all its own -- for the children and the children yet unborn. And the pity of it is that these things cannot be confined to the Twilight Zone."

His observation is brilliantly sound. We cannot simply banish an ego to the Twilight Zone nor become so selfless that we all could stand in for Jesus Christ, but if left unchecked an ego can evolve into the greatest weapon against humanity.

For those who wield little power or influence, the ego doesn't present such a hazard to society as it does to ourselves. Cullen Hightower was quoted, "Our ego is our silent partner--too often with a controlling interest." The control that a healthy ego can have over a person is synonymous to social and professional suicide. Think too much of yourself and you will be ignored, thus killing your ego with soul crushing humility.

One of my favorite pieces of wisdom on managing ego comes from Colin Powell. He said, "Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your position falls, your ego goes with it."

Again, there is nothing wrong with having an ego. It is apart of our design. But the ego can be an incredibly powerful tool or influence over your degree of happiness, success, prosperity; all things positive in your life.

Never let an ego navigate the course of your life's journey. Think and see with a clear lens and let your heart be an open, welcoming space. When it's all said and done, you'll be grateful you did.

A Simple Truth from Benjamin Franklin

The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.
- Benjamin Franklin

On this day, take a moment to ponder what sincerely makes you happy. It could be anything.

You may be surprised at what you ultimately admit to yourself. Material possessions may simply fall by the wayside. Whatever brings you joy, acknowledge it, pursue it and seize it with all of your might. Never let anyone snuff out or dampen these feelings, for when you are happy, those around you will feel your happiness and the feeling will continue to spread.

Pursue true happiness. You'll be grateful you did. 

Slow Down

One evening, while taking out my recycling, I stumbled across this little guy making his way up or down or perhaps around one of the bottles. I couldn't remember the last time I had seen a live snail--I do enjoy French cuisine--but I took his presence to be a personal reminder to slow down.

The way we communicate, the various ways we travel, how we process information, the pace at which we work and even the pace at which we socialize has increased dramatically over the past few decades. I did not understand why some people referred to life as a rat race when I was a youngster, but I certainly understand now.

The pressure to keep up with the world around us is heavy. The pressure to stay ahead is mind-numbing.

Life is not fulfilled but constantly keeping up or getting ahead. From this stems worry, stress, anxiety and tension that leads to ill effects on your physical and emotional state that not only spells bad news for you, but bad news for the health of the relationships you value.

Sometimes, it's good to be a snail. In fact, I would argue that removing yourself from the race and unplugging yourself from the digital world at least for twelve hours a week is vital to maintaining a happy and healthy life.

There are so many wonderful things, great and small, elaborate and simple to be grateful for that we rarely take notice of, let alone stop to fully appreciate.

Two facts reign true for each of our lives and those are that we will be born and we will die. The life we live in between should not be a constant race.

Slow down from time to time. Take in the world. Take in your friends and loved ones. Celebrate your life now. There will come a time when what you've achieved and the advantage or privilege you've gained will not matter.

If You've Ever Loved a Pet, You'll Understand

Meet Quarterback (QB) & Sadie -

If you've ever loved a pet, you'll understand why I am including my two beasts in this series on love. When thinking about people, things or experiences that I love or have loved, I have to include them.

I adopted both three months apart from a shelter I volunteered at from time to time when I was in college. It took some time to become comfortable with one another and I even went through a phase of adoptive remorse, but over the past few years they have become my two favorite things about coming home.

When I adopted Sadie, she had been at the shelter for a year and was slated for transfer to another shelter, which implied potential euthanasia.

QB was brought into the shelter by a woman who took him from some kids who had soaked him in lighter fluid. Before she could rinse him off he escaped, still soaked and very flammable. Three days later he showed up on her doorstep with what seemed to be neurological damage from the chemicals. I volunteered to foster him and confirmed adoption two weeks later.

 

 

  

  

 

 

Laugh if you must, say I have too much time on my hands or that they're why I'm single, etc. I can't help laughing at myself daily when I realize that there are more than a few stereotypes of cat ownership that I can admit to, especially how they have evolved from being pets to figurative children.

Simply, I love them and, in their own way, I believe they love me. If nothing else, we cohabit well.

Whatever species of animal piques your fancy or pulls at your heartstrings, I'd advise against letting them consume your life, but make sure they know you love them.

They'll be grateful for you and you'll be grateful for them.