There are No Prerequisites for Being Grateful

Over the weekend I received some feedback regarding Grateful Brand that was very positive in the general scope of praise, but this individual alarmed me with what was, in my opinion, a very narrow and misguided viewpoint of the origins of gratitude and what one must be to experience what was stated as being, “true gratitude.”

For the purpose of this entry, we will refer to this individual as Mary.

With a warm embrace and encouragement to continue developing Grateful Brand, Mary asserted that, “We need more young Christian men like you in the world expressing their gratitude. Lord knows where we would be if there weren’t people like us.” 

I knew Mary’s intentions were well founded and because of her pleasant nature I did not have the heart to tell her that I did not identify with the Christian faith nor any faith for that matter, but that I am simply a privately spiritual person. I was alarmed because, in her mind, there was only one reasonable explanation as to why I could have been producing Grateful Brand and that reason was that I was a born again Christian. I had to be. Christianity was the absolute truth and there weren’t exceptions. But what if I was Muslim, Jewish, Buddhist, Mormon, a Scientologist or, dare I say, completely Atheist? Would it matter? Sadly, in Mary’s mind, I think it would.

I would like to give you a brief, assumed history of gratitude in relation to human beings. You’ll have to pardon me, though, as I am basing this assumption on logic and what limited anthropological education I have. I do not hold a PhD in evolutionary biology nor have I ever been to seminary. Based on what I know to be the nature of human beings, I would deduce that from mankind’s introduction to the world, we have been fighting for survival. It is a natural and instinctual response to express appreciation either behaviorally or through verbal communication in a effort to gain favorable odds for having that which is appreciated occur again, thus making survival easier, even if only by the slightest of margins.

Mary implied that to be “truly grateful,” one must have a relationship with the Christian God, otherwise, there would not be as much to be grateful for. Life could not possibly be as fulfilling. She may not have said it explicitly, but her convictions were forthright and expressed through who she was and how she functioned in her surroundings. What alarms me about this is that Mary is not alone. Billions of people around the globe would need to convert; need to change their belief system to live on a divinely higher plain, enabling them to express true gratitude. For the record, I completely disagree with this. To be grateful, you need only be human. It is this shared quality and being able to bestow kindness that produces gratitude.

The cyclical nature of gratitude is that people who have something to be grateful for perform acts of kindness. Mary may be a woman of strong conviction, but there are no differentiating values associated with the extent of her gratitude and my own. We are grateful.

I affirm anyone’s right to believe as they will, but I need only look back through history to know that religious differences have motivated the slaughter of millions of people over the course of our humanly existence. With beliefs so strong, I can understand how people can forget that we are all just human.