Grateful Brand was created to serve as a reminder of the importance of being grateful, expressing this gratitude through positive messaging and acts of kindness.
Alice Herz-Sommers in an accomplished pianist and author at the age of 108, but she is also a Holocaust survivor. There is not much one can say about the experience of being a Holocaust victim without inciting unimaginable dread, but Alice has a very different take on her experience. She says that throughout her time in the concentration camps, she always smiled, looking only where there is good.
She expresses gratitude for absolutely everything, even her time as a detainee. Does she hate her former captors? Her answer is no.
"Hatred eats the soul of the hater, not the hated."
Love, compassion and kindness will always win out over hatred. While I do not subscribe to any particular faith, today I am grateful for Rose City Park United Methodist Church for being bold enough to honestly stand for the greater good of humanity, not just their Christian community.
Kindness is kindness, whether you are Atheist or Christian. Hatred is hatred, whether you are Atheist or Christian.
This world is full of self serving individuals who pander hate, intolerance and bigotry as direct messengers from the God in which they believe and serve, but they are wrong. God is not a man in the sky manipulating us as pawns to do his bidding. God is love, compassion and kindness.
God is a Christian, Jew, Muslim etc. who opens his place of worship, his home and his heart to his neighbor without prejudice or judgement. God is an Atheist who is kind, compassionate and loving. An Atheist need not believe in anything to be the best representation of what a divine presence on earth would be, for these qualities are divine in the sense that they are the best of what human beings can be.
Consider this if you will. The predominant faiths of the world promise a better life in heaven if you live your life on Earth as a devout believer. Heaven is a reward that motivates the lives and behaviors of billions of people. If I do 'X', I will get 'Y'. A kind, compassionate and loving Atheist expects nothing when all is said and done. There is no equation. There is no reward.
Who is more God-like? What if there were no carrot on a stick dangling just out of reach? Would you still pull the cart?
Don't ask me how the name came to be. All I know is that since I was able to make noise, I have referred to my grandmother as, Ra Ra. My name for her may be unique among the Grandmas, Grannies and Nannas of the world, but a nickname matters little in contrast to what she is and what she means to me.
Most importantly, my Ra Ra is love. She has been there for me in ways that no one else has. While not the same as either of my parents, I would equate her vested interest in me to theirs without hesitation. But she is also a woman of tremendous poise, grace, intelligence, faith, compassion and confidence beyond measure. She is a huge inspiration whom I admire and respect very much.
I am writing about her today because, yesterday, I walked into my new office for the first time since accepting my new employers offer. I met my coworkers, received paper work, a new computer, typical first day welcome materials, gifts and well wishes, but as I sat down at my desk and took in what my professional future will be for possibly many years to come, I could not help saying to myself the phrase, "time on task."
"Time on task" can be interpreted simply as 'focus' or a less commanding variation of "pay attention," but this phrase and the story behind it mean a lot more to me.
When I was young, perhaps as early as four years old, I would spend extended visits with my grandparents at their home in southern Virginia. It is with my Ra Ra that I gained a passion for reading; for learning in ways that no teacher I have ever been formally educated by has ever been able to replicate. Instead of demanding my attention or forcing a lesson upon me, "time on task" became a repetitive tool of mental manipulation that has stuck with me ever since. I remember her saying this phrase in improvised songs, simple rhymes and even while cleaning, being just audible enough for me to hear, "time on task, time on task, time on task." I did not understand at the time why she was being so redundant, but when in my final semester in college, taking 27 credit hours so that I could be eligible for graduation, I realized what she had instilled in me.
Now, as an adult, the importance of effective time management is vital to my continued success, yet the best lesson I have ever received on maintaining my personal productivity remains that simple phrase, "time on task."
I love this woman. Not just for what she has taught me but for who she is and has been in my life.
Be grateful for your grandparents. If you are so fortunate to still have your grandparents around, give them your time and your consideration. You may learn something, perhaps even discover something about yourself and your family's history. Who knows? I do know that if nothing else, you can share in love, from one generation to another.
Grateful Brand was created to encourage universal love, kindness and gratitude, not to endorse nor promote any religion. With that being said, as the creator of this blog, I am deeply inspired by my own personal spirituality and many love promoting figures of various faiths.
As the title of this post may incite, how can one be afraid of saying "God," especially one who claims to be rather in tune with many qualities that God supposedly embodies?
For centuries, men of self proclaimed devout faith have interpreted and enforced the abiding of precise criteria that, according to their interpretations, must be met to be loved in the eyes of God and to receive the affection of their communities.
While I do not approve of how the concept of sin is used to strangle good people into submission, as human beings, sin abounds, yet the degree of consequence for most of these sins is, in reality, quite benign. You need only repent your sin to receive love. Many faiths assert that their followers are loved unconditionally in spite of their sins. But what is one to do when an innate otherness forces them outside the parameters of the criteria of good men and women?
This is my predicament. As a gay man, I have struggled with faith for years. I have even gone through an extended period of not believing simply because atheism or being agnostic made sense. More importantly, not believing made it easy to simultaneously expel the variable of emotion that so often goes hand in hand with faith.
As I have matured, the scope of my beliefs and wants have evolved, which has resulted in me seeking out a belief system and medium for expressing what I feel. Gratitude has become the basis of this belief system and I attend a nondenominational church to express this gratitude to the Universe.
I have become comfortable with saying "the Universe" because the usage of "God" has been manipulated, skewed and bastardized to an alarming degree. Some of the most vehement proponents of Christianity seemingly hold the usage of "God" hostage, exploiting what should be synonymous with love for the purpose of hate. The Westboro Baptist Church and their website, www.godhatesfags.com, is an extreme example. But they are not the catalyst for my struggle with faith.
Friends, family and colleagues, in casual conversation, have all said that the presumed choice of being gay is wrong and a sin in the eyes of God, yet some of the same people have asserted that God created the Universe and everything in it in his image ... and God makes no misstates. So where does this leave me?
In America, I am free to live my life, though there are people who petition and vote for the limitation of my liberties in contrast to heterosexuals. Unfortunately, the world at large is much crueler. There are people whom I will never meet but would justify my death by saying, "it is God's will." This puts things into perspective. I am a good person who avoids uncomfortable conversation about faith for fear of rejection. Imagine being a good person but being subjected to the death penalty for falling in love.
I say, "the Universe," because no one will object to my open sexuality in association, and therefore I feel safe. My belief system is neutral and thus, I am comfortable. Conversations regarding my belief in the infinite power and possibility enveloped in the Universe never result in me defending myself nor being shamed or demeaned.
This neutrality also allows me to affirm and celebrate who I am. In 1855, the excentric poet, Walt Whitman, penned his most famous work, Song of Myself, in his book, Leaves of Grass. The first stanza of this poem reads, "I celebrate myself." I literally wear this quote as you will notice.
Being able to affirm ones sense of self worth and feeling balanced in mind, body and spirit is a wonderful sensation. But in spite of my affirmation, I am gripped by a lingering fear that pauses my confidence when wanting to live fully and boldly as a good person who wants to believe in God. Because of this fear, I have relegated myself to the Universe. Some might argue that they are one in the same but in my psyche, I have become accustomed to an alternative as a result of mankind stripping away my equality; denouncing my otherness as a flaw.
Recently, I was moved by the compassionate words of a brilliant man who was bold enough to voice the confidence I wish I had regarding his conviction. With ease and eloquence, Jordan Bach--writer, blogger, advocate, uncle and all around good guy--championed via Youtube that, "God loves gays." From a personal standpoint, I have wanted to believe and embrace this without ever having a second thought, but it has been so painfully difficult to ignore the hate that many faithful people cling to and use as weapons. Jordan wears an amazing shield. That shield is love.
I first saw Jordan's video on the Huffington Post and I was moved to tears because I knew that even though he and I may never meet and I may never have the opportunity to shake his hand and thank him for his poise and strength directly, I knew that he stood with me in solidarity, and for that I am exceedingly grateful.
After an evening out with friends, I encountered Robert while walking back to my car. He was wrapped as you can see in the picture above in a striped blanket under a brightly lit bus stop awning.
Homeless people are everywhere in Los Angeles, but I took pity on Robert because it was cold out and he was coughing violently.
Robert wasn't far from where I was parked and I happened to have a case of water in my trunk. I pulled out a few bottles and returned them to him, quietly leaving them by his shoulder. I did not want to interact. I was tired and just wanted to hurry home. But upon my third or fourth step away I heard a muffled and raspy, "thank you" from beneath the blanket. I returned to him and asked if he wanted a ride to a shelter or to a hospital to which he replied, "No, thank you. There's no space. There's never any space. I'll be fine. Thank you."
I don't know how Robert ended up in his situation nor do I feel it matters very much. What alarms me is that his plight is the same as over 51,000 other people in Los Angeles county and in relation to volume, little is being done to combat this crisis.
It is very common to hear people complaining about the dense population of homeless people. "Something needs to be done," is the typical assertion.
Well, according to many government officials and homeless advocates, more shelters need to be built and more resources need to be allocated. But this requires space being provided or zoned accordingly and the reason why these shelters have not been built nor the resources allocated is because while people want the problem to go away, no one wants the problem addressed in their neighborhoods or in their local public spaces.
"Something needs to be done, but do it some where else." This is the attitude facing the unsheltered homeless population in Los Angeles county.
So, what are people like Robert to do? Where should he legally go to stay out of the way while trying to recover his health, his dignity, his livelihood and his morale?
We so often forget that Robert could very well be you or me with the loss of a job, a foreclosure or life just taking a turn for the worse. Mental illness or drug addiction could lead to homelessness. A series of frivolous poor decisions may even factor into the equation. Whatever the endless number of reasons may be, there are unfortunately far fewer solutions being offered and hands being extended to help.
If you read this and you have any compassion in your heart, please do something. Where ever you are. Every kind gesture, no matter how small, matters.
This is NASA's latest image of the Blue Marble, better known as Earth. Considering how many thousands of miles away the telescope that took this beautiful image must have been in relation to its incredible detail, I find it easy to lose five to ten minutes at a time staring. Just think of how small and insignificant we are to the size and life span of our planet. Our existence will be but a blink when all is said and done. Consider how small Earth is in relation to our solar system, the Universe, and what ever may be beyond that. It's all so fascinating yet mind boggling at the same time.
Consider now the invisible forces that make it all possible: gravity, magnetism, perhaps even other forces we have yet to discover.
I'm no physicist or astronomer, but I do think it's incredible that the Universe and its contents are pushed and pulled, spun, expanded and contracted all due to forces that we cannot see, but that we know exist.
Think, now, of love, compassion, kindness and gratitude. Is it too far fetched to think of these as "forces," pushing and pulling, spinning, expanding and contracting the human race and how we treat one another? Like magnetism, for every positive there must also be a negative such as hate or intolerance.
Call me a nerd if you must, but I like the idea of wielding a special power, the fantasy of "The Force." The difference between me and Yoda though, is that I don't need a light saber or a laser gun and I have no intention of fighting any epic battles.
All I have is love, compassion, kindness and gratitude: my arsenal for combating all the negativity that wants to rain down on me and those I care about. You'd be amazed at how powerful you can feel when you're able to stand unwaveringly firm in the face of negativity if you believe in the power you have within you to defeat it.
Think of Gandhi for instance. Surely he would find this hypothesis of force very appealing, if he hadn't already thought of it himself.
A human being is part of a whole, called by us the Universe, a part
limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and
feelings, as something separated from the rest--a kind of optical
delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us,
restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few
persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison
by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures
and the whole of nature in its beauty.
- Albert Einstein
Famous for his contributions to math, science and physics, most acknowledge Einstein as a precise, calculating man. This, however, does not justly capture the full breadth of his aptitude for elevated thought.
There is no science to being grateful or showing compassion. There are no equations, laws or theorems that aid us in controlling our degree of consciousness in relation to the Universe. Compassion and gratitude are deeper entities, intangible; powerful in application and influence yet delicate when faced by the world's onslaught of negativity.
Compassion and gratitude are two ingredients that help compose the human spirit. We all share this recipe in our subconscious minds. Whether or not we bring our awareness of them to a heightened state of consciousness varies from person to person.
Einstein knew this and he knew that to live at our collective best, we must escape the prisons of ourselves.
