Grateful Brand was created to serve as a reminder of the importance of being grateful, expressing this gratitude through positive messaging and acts of kindness.
Love, compassion and kindness will always win out over hatred. While I do not subscribe to any particular faith, today I am grateful for Rose City Park United Methodist Church for being bold enough to honestly stand for the greater good of humanity, not just their Christian community.
Kindness is kindness, whether you are Atheist or Christian. Hatred is hatred, whether you are Atheist or Christian.
This world is full of self serving individuals who pander hate, intolerance and bigotry as direct messengers from the God in which they believe and serve, but they are wrong. God is not a man in the sky manipulating us as pawns to do his bidding. God is love, compassion and kindness.
God is a Christian, Jew, Muslim etc. who opens his place of worship, his home and his heart to his neighbor without prejudice or judgement. God is an Atheist who is kind, compassionate and loving. An Atheist need not believe in anything to be the best representation of what a divine presence on earth would be, for these qualities are divine in the sense that they are the best of what human beings can be.
Consider this if you will. The predominant faiths of the world promise a better life in heaven if you live your life on Earth as a devout believer. Heaven is a reward that motivates the lives and behaviors of billions of people. If I do 'X', I will get 'Y'. A kind, compassionate and loving Atheist expects nothing when all is said and done. There is no equation. There is no reward.
Who is more God-like? What if there were no carrot on a stick dangling just out of reach? Would you still pull the cart?
Think for a moment about how the responsibilities of the typical hetero-normative (or rather stereotypical) American home is divided based on gender.
Women cook, clean, tend to children, do laundry, organize social gatherings; all things that demand a woman's eye for detail, care and nurturing.
Men are typically left to matters of the garage and the yard; what some men would argue as being a kind gesture to save women from getting dirty.
While this stereotypical man only regularly assumes responsibility of the yard and matters of the garage, he is still granted the title of Head of Household for typically being the primary breadwinner.
The issue of women's rights is at the forefront of debate, yet again in the United States, and the issue at hand is whether or not women should have access to birth control through their employer provided insurance. Not surprisingly, many men and many conservatives disagree. My opinion on the subject does not matter, but I would like to present an observation of parallels.
As previously stated, men are stereotypically courteous by assuming responsibility of yard and garage related chores. Now, consider the automobile. For most people, the automobile is an extension of self; an appendage, if you will, that we control, use to impress, use to thrill and typically make a concerted effort to protect and maintain. This is a generalization, but men, being the breadwinners that they are, are allotted a smaller, sportier car with which to commute to and from work, while women are typically envisioned as house wives, soccer moms or working professionals who masterfully balance their careers and their homes. Regardless, women are typically seen in less glamorous sedans, SUVs and mini vans.
Being that men typically assume responsibility of matters pertaining to the garage, this would mean that they typically assume responsibility of a family's automobiles. The car, being an enjoyable extension of self is parked in the garage, which man claims as his own. Every tool, the lawnmower, craft, project, etc. are housed in the garage or a similar shed.
Now consider male anatomy in relation to female anatomy. Do you gather how male genitalia serves as an analogy for an automobile and how female genitalia serve as an analogy for a garage? The idea of controlling what happens and where things go in their presumed "garage" is the thought process behind much the current debate of contraception. Morality, ethics and faith based arguments are all convenient excuses that distract from the core issue at hand: there are men who, as a result of their beliefs, are resistant to giving up control of that which they deem as their entitled property. They are backed by their conservative allies, female colleagues and supporters who affirm the subservient role of a woman to a man.
This way of thinking will ultimately die off and become extinct because contrary to what many elected officials and their supporters believe, times are changing and have been changing from decade to decade. People are evolving and we are being forced to adapt to an ever changing social environment.
Sex happens. You may not see or hear it, but rest assured, it is happening.
Conservatism has an archaic habit of wanting to control and exploit women rather than equalize and support. The fact remains, women are not cars. You cannot park yourself, your legislation, rules or opinion in them just because you are in a role of leadership, or go so far as to think you own them.
Controlling is not being grateful for women. Protecting a woman's best interest, healthy and safety is expressing gratitude for women. There are many men who will simply fail to evolve and adapt in light of their presumed entitlement and authority. For example, Rush Limbaugh, the conservative radio host, has recently found himself in a precarious situation because of his outburst against Sandra Fluke, a law student arguing in favor of contraception. In an attempt to belittle and demean her, he called her a "slut" and a "prostitute," on his radio show, but it is his advertisers that are now abandoning him in droves. Surely, this was not the response he expected his inflammatory words to produce.
I would argue that the only people to find his remarks humorous would have probably looked like him, or older. There is also a strong likelihood that many of them were in their garages, listening on their hand held radios, comfortably in their ways, unwilling to adapt or evolve.
Grateful Brand was created to encourage universal love, kindness and gratitude, not to endorse nor promote any religion. With that being said, as the creator of this blog, I am deeply inspired by my own personal spirituality and many love promoting figures of various faiths.
As the title of this post may incite, how can one be afraid of saying "God," especially one who claims to be rather in tune with many qualities that God supposedly embodies?
For centuries, men of self proclaimed devout faith have interpreted and enforced the abiding of precise criteria that, according to their interpretations, must be met to be loved in the eyes of God and to receive the affection of their communities.
While I do not approve of how the concept of sin is used to strangle good people into submission, as human beings, sin abounds, yet the degree of consequence for most of these sins is, in reality, quite benign. You need only repent your sin to receive love. Many faiths assert that their followers are loved unconditionally in spite of their sins. But what is one to do when an innate otherness forces them outside the parameters of the criteria of good men and women?
This is my predicament. As a gay man, I have struggled with faith for years. I have even gone through an extended period of not believing simply because atheism or being agnostic made sense. More importantly, not believing made it easy to simultaneously expel the variable of emotion that so often goes hand in hand with faith.
As I have matured, the scope of my beliefs and wants have evolved, which has resulted in me seeking out a belief system and medium for expressing what I feel. Gratitude has become the basis of this belief system and I attend a nondenominational church to express this gratitude to the Universe.
I have become comfortable with saying "the Universe" because the usage of "God" has been manipulated, skewed and bastardized to an alarming degree. Some of the most vehement proponents of Christianity seemingly hold the usage of "God" hostage, exploiting what should be synonymous with love for the purpose of hate. The Westboro Baptist Church and their website, www.godhatesfags.com, is an extreme example. But they are not the catalyst for my struggle with faith.
Friends, family and colleagues, in casual conversation, have all said that the presumed choice of being gay is wrong and a sin in the eyes of God, yet some of the same people have asserted that God created the Universe and everything in it in his image ... and God makes no misstates. So where does this leave me?
In America, I am free to live my life, though there are people who petition and vote for the limitation of my liberties in contrast to heterosexuals. Unfortunately, the world at large is much crueler. There are people whom I will never meet but would justify my death by saying, "it is God's will." This puts things into perspective. I am a good person who avoids uncomfortable conversation about faith for fear of rejection. Imagine being a good person but being subjected to the death penalty for falling in love.
I say, "the Universe," because no one will object to my open sexuality in association, and therefore I feel safe. My belief system is neutral and thus, I am comfortable. Conversations regarding my belief in the infinite power and possibility enveloped in the Universe never result in me defending myself nor being shamed or demeaned.
This neutrality also allows me to affirm and celebrate who I am. In 1855, the excentric poet, Walt Whitman, penned his most famous work, Song of Myself, in his book, Leaves of Grass. The first stanza of this poem reads, "I celebrate myself." I literally wear this quote as you will notice.
Being able to affirm ones sense of self worth and feeling balanced in mind, body and spirit is a wonderful sensation. But in spite of my affirmation, I am gripped by a lingering fear that pauses my confidence when wanting to live fully and boldly as a good person who wants to believe in God. Because of this fear, I have relegated myself to the Universe. Some might argue that they are one in the same but in my psyche, I have become accustomed to an alternative as a result of mankind stripping away my equality; denouncing my otherness as a flaw.
Recently, I was moved by the compassionate words of a brilliant man who was bold enough to voice the confidence I wish I had regarding his conviction. With ease and eloquence, Jordan Bach--writer, blogger, advocate, uncle and all around good guy--championed via Youtube that, "God loves gays." From a personal standpoint, I have wanted to believe and embrace this without ever having a second thought, but it has been so painfully difficult to ignore the hate that many faithful people cling to and use as weapons. Jordan wears an amazing shield. That shield is love.
I first saw Jordan's video on the Huffington Post and I was moved to tears because I knew that even though he and I may never meet and I may never have the opportunity to shake his hand and thank him for his poise and strength directly, I knew that he stood with me in solidarity, and for that I am exceedingly grateful.
Light is used as a common metaphor for a myriad of positive things: good energy, ideas, divinity, a heavenly space or presence, love, enlightenment, clarity, etc. Interestingly, "the light" is usually something we must go to or search for and discover. This is easy to understand because from a very literal stand point, light--being the kind of light that we use to brighten our homes--does not come from within us, but from finding and flipping a switch on a wall or a lamp.
When considering all of the metaphorical possibilities of light, do we necessarily need to discover it as derived from some other entity or source?
In hundreds, if not thousands of films, there are those classic, "I see the light" moments when a character finally realizes something important as apart of the plot of the story. These "I see the light" moments happen regularly in reality as well. Of course, inspiration or transfer of knowledge from one person to the other or even a profound religious or spiritual experience can cause an inner light switch to be flipped on, but have you ever considered the possibility that you yourself are the light?
Well, now is the time to begin to not just consider the possibility, but to believe it and affirm it.
You are the light!
In our search for reason, answers, solutions and understanding it is easy to externalize the source of all these things because, for one, this is what many of us are taught and conditioned to do, but also because with internalizing comes a sense of responsibility and accountability that many people avoid.
Internalizing the source of metaphorical light may also require bolstering faith in yourself; a heightened sense of belief and confidence. Once you affirm this inner strength you need only look in the mirror. Instead of seeing the light as something separate that you must acquire, you will realize that you are indeed the light and have been the light even when you failed to realize it in the past.
You will no longer have to live your life in a cloud of thought synonymous to a vast dark room full of mislabeled switches. You will be the answer. You will be the reason, the solution, and you will be able to come to a degree of understanding and resolve unlike anything you've ever experienced before. You will be able to stand in the face of everything because you are the light and will cast your light on a path of success and happiness.
